Based on true stories~ (kinda)

1.
Alyssa:
you never take me seriously
also Alyssa:
ydyuzdgdcygcd bbgxsvv I candb tyjdube righdy dbgow
me:

me:
why is there word soup?
(besides she's scouse. scousers aren't supposed to be taken seriously)

2.
Alyssa: I like dolphins, they're my favourite animals
me: that's lovely
Alyssa: swimming with dolphins would be nice
Alyssa: you know what else I'd like to do with dolphi-
me:

she's going to the seaside next month. the Romanian seaside. the Black Sea seaside. Guess who live in the Black Sea? yep; 🐬🐬
Sounds like a Summer romance

3.
when you're fantasizing about yo man, and your mum gently reminds you you might wanna look for a boyfriend 'younger than 77'

4.
*mum = alyssa's mum and the adoptive Romanian mum I never had
mum: -mentally prepares herself to go into Alyssa's room-
mum: it's okay
mum: you've done everything to keep your children away from that cursed city
mum: your other kids turned out fineee, why would this one be different
mum: -trying to ignore the whole backpack incident-
mum: -opens bedroom door-
alyssa: oh hi, mum-
computer screen be laich showin':

alyssa: I-IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKEeeeEeE
mum:

mum: -FLASHBACKS TO LIVERPOOL AND BEATLEMANIA-

5.
this blog post is dedicated to ppl talking to themselves, apparently (lol)

me: - talking thinking to self -
me: I guess generally speaking I've been a good friend
me: sure, stirred up some drama   owo
me: been sarcastic maybeee a few times, heh
me: but other than that, I think I've done a good job

Alyssa: I've decided
me: about what?
Alyssa: I'm gonna take after you
me: that's ni-
me:

me: well ... guess I messed up after all
^^^^
see kids, this is what vodka does to your brain ... giving you crazy ideas and such

1 like = 1 portion of common sense for Alyssa


6.
Alyssa: well, I mean, I don't think I need to explain it to you
me: sure!

also me:

 I'M SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER SOMETHING


7.
me: cludi has been active for 72 hours now
me: no sign of life whatsoever ...
me: I guess I can now ... remove these cringy messag-
-2 seconds later-
alyssa: DON'T U DARE

me: 

it's even more accurate since both chihuahuas and alyssa are smoll

BONUS:

Alyssa: so you still delete messages, after all this time?

me: °v°

once a lil shit, always a lil shit

8.

alyssa: I'm drunk ;w;

me: pffffff, Scousers ... always the same
also me, at the same time:

-drinks entire glass of sangria in one sip-

.。･:*:･✿ This friendship is based on alcohol and crying, yay ✿･:*:･。.


Woah, you actually read the entire dumb blog post,
as a reward have this dumb meme

no wonder she can't remember her hometown, she had other "priorities"