#Whathappensinthekingdomofisolationstaysinthekingdomofisolation

Warning: long post is long~

1. Tribute to Cludi 
Let's talk about the n°1 Liverpudlian romance
you might probably wonder how this beautiful romance started
The year was 1516, on May 15th
there was a beautiful ceremony, in the Ye Good Ol' Chappel, in  Liverpool

Although in a few months we'll be celebrating the 500th anniversay of the lovely royal couple, Teh Kwin still has trouble when the marriage is mentioned (but tsundere? Teh Kwin? naaaaaaaaah!)

Looks like Cludi was thinking about trembling girlhoods again
and yes, there's a picture of the Holy Jawhnsus in the first picture, because he loves all Liverpudlians, even if they are Paul-curious

who thinks about teh kwin, thinks about 'triggered just by a touch'

 Doesn't that sound like the description of a Disney film (and not just any Disney film, Cludi's favourite °v°)

“In Liverpool's weird kingdom, a ruler did appear.
Born with a love for Paul so great, isolated, she stayed in fear.
Although the love was hidden, one day she misspoke.
And all her friends... were jest really really confused.”
 -Source: list of Liverpudlian weirdos

 
To end the tribute to our beloved Kwin of tsundere and Teh Cehteh uf Lehverpowl, we decided to bring back some memories of beautiful Cludi moments
 1. Cludi wants more Pawl 

 you don't wanna get full? full of what? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

2.  when Cludi insulted her own native language

THIS IS NORMAL ENGLISH
oooh, wejll ekscjuz ehs, for nawt spiking nehrmehl inglish, teh peoples frum Lehverpowl kent help eht they'r speshal k? ;------;
and let's not forget abawt teh most speshal one of them all not including Cludi

3. the OTP 5EVA (Cludi x Paul) became canon

a very rare moment, since it's the only moment in blog history when Cludi didn't deny her feelings for Pawl ;w; snif, makes me all emotional

Tribute to Cludina George & fwiends

Welcome to another edition of Cludi & fwiends!

let's face it, these edits are the perfect representation for Cludi (and they kinda look like her, it's kinda creepy °o° )

here we have:
-Cludi talking to her reflection

someone has to tell her when Pawl isn't around, right

-Cludi accepting compliments (based on a true story)

-and ofcourse, just like Regina from the original film she has a guy she's in love with, but she never mentions she still loves him (until someone else does and then they get mentioned in her burn book XDD)

 (my beautiful home screen on my cellphone XDDD OTP5EVA)

and then there's, ofcourse, the one normal friend, Evelyn

and then there's me, the one with a fifth sense, a fifth sense to sense Liverpudlian logic

 Me: 'If u're from Liverpool, then why are u normal?'

Cludi: 'MOG, Madu, you can't ask ppl why they're normal'

Dreaaaams~

okay, so I have about 3 to 4 dreams every night. Most of them are completely random.
but every now and then my mind and subconsciousness decide to involve friends
mostly online friends
this time it was Cludi

Sooo, me and a bunch of other people stayed in resort, in this really fancy hotel with a big swimming pool, palm trees, etc
me and three other girls (that I didn't know at all .___. ) were like the local superheroes that had to make sure society stayed safe (by society I mean the hotel XD)
I spent time with the other three girls most of the time. However, there was one, kind of anti social girl in the resort, and I was the only person who was her friend. Guess who that was :D yup, that's Cludi XDDD
I dunno, the other girls were kinda shallow and Cludi was kinda weird and stayed in her dark hotel room all the time, while the others were always around the swimming pool and having fun. She probably got judged by everyone else
The resort had been peaceful for a pretty long time. Until one dayI met with Cludi. We were having a random conversation but at one moment Cludi asked 'Do you know why I am the lonely weird person I am today
and there it was: the long, dramatic backgroundstory every VILLAIN has!
yup, that's right, Cludi was the villain all along. and she showed me lots of papers
(the weird thing is that Liverpool, zoos and dolphins didn't get mentioned in the backgroundstory .___. hmm...)
anyway, the papers were filled with all her plans about how she would turn the lives of everyone living in the resort into hell,, I think there were illuminati references on them, too
and then I was quiet for a few minutes
and after those few minutes I said: 'I guess there's no nice way to say this, but...Cludi, I...I think you're crazy...and not in the positive fun way.'
and she gave me this really, really disapproving look (even worse than the usual XD)
People never like it when you assume they're crazy, geez
she didn't say that much 'cause she was pretty pissed, but all I said was 'you do realise I still have to kick your ass if you go on with this'
and she just threw me out of her room saying 'that I was just like all the other people in the resort'

that's where the dream ended
will the resort ever be safe? who will tell D:

but I feel like something's missing, so I decided to come up with an ending myself
 so, me and the other three girls kicked Cludi's ass, her plans failed. She locked herself in her dark hotel room. She became really desperate, she was telling weird things (no suprise there, it's Cludi after all) and said that she would use spells to make sure she would disappear, away from the resort...I tried to calm her down, but it didn't help
me and Cludi had been friends ever since we were little, so I felt like I had to help her (why am I such a good person in this dream XD).
And I knew there was only one solution: getting Paul to the hotel
(how can I get celebrities into the hotel? the answer is probably 'magic')
In the meantime I tried to reason with her: everything would be okay, laik relli 
but she didn't believe me and said 'NO, IT'S TOO LATE FOR ME' and probably other crazy shit
but in the end, Paul was able to convince her, he didn't mind her being crazy
after all, like attracts like
I- I mean they lived happily after
They moved to Paul's home, which was another magical kingdom, Cludi felt really home there
as if....this place could've been her home in another life °o°
the locals loved her that much that they even made her queen

the end~

So, are the conclusions of my subconsciousness correct?
Cludi says a lot of crazy stuff? true
Madu is a genuinly good person? probably true 

Cludi's favourite animal

[9/02/2016 20:48:46] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: Dolphins 'love' ppl, well they show their love by trying to rape us
[9/02/2016 20:48:49] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: but still

[9/02/2016 20:48:59] nerd: it's not rape if you enjoy it

[9/02/2016 20:49:03] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: true
[9/02/2016 20:49:11] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: wait
[9/02/2016 20:49:15] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: did u just
[9/02/2016 20:49:17] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: say
[9/02/2016 20:49:21] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: u would enjoy
[9/02/2016 20:49:23] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: XDD

The city of Liverpool has confirmed Cludi is not allowed in their harbour anymore...

 my little dolphin

my little dolpin

wot ehs lovin' all abawt ~

Teh Kwin's getting old

-MEANWHILE IN THE DAILY SCOUSER-

TEH KWIN OF LEHVERPOWL OFFICIALLY HAS DEMENTIA-

 [9/02/2016 22:14:53] nerd: and
[9/02/2016 22:14:56] nerd: really
[9/02/2016 22:15:07] nerd: u think my bf is paul?
[9/02/2016 22:15:18] nerd: cuz battles museum, u said

(looks like SOMEONE hasn't been paying attention to the blog)

my OTP is in danger!

CODE RED!

COOODE RED!

 

 [9/02/2016 22:15:50] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: why do you think my status Always says OTP 5eva
[9/02/2016 22:16:34] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: I just made the secret files blog post
[9/02/2016 22:16:36] ☆ ★ MΛDƱƱƱ ★ ☆: and others

 time to save the OTP 5EVA!

okay, let's look at the pro's and cons of this dementia:

 CONS: ('cause negativity first)

 -after 5000 years of marriage she forgot Paul :c

PRO'S:

-I mean, Paul is 73. plus he did more drugs and lsd any other person ever did. there's a pretty big chance he's demented as well..another thing they have in common

- now that Cludi is old and demented they can still do other couple activities, like noon naps and forgetting each other's name

(very popular among older couples) 

I think they're already acting like an old coupe, Cludi even said so
sorry I'm half asleep
Sorry I was having a noon nap and forgot about life

The secret files of the kingdom of isolation

Before you look at the title and wonder if I'm drunk (to which the answer is 'no' btw, although I've had a lot of wine yesterday, so I may still be slightly tipsy XD).
By now we all know kingdom of isolation is Scouse for bedroom and...well...secret files just means secret files (believe it or not, but sometimes Scouse actually looks a lot like decent English!!!)

what theme will be discussed in this blog post?
INFATUATION!
because, let's face it, if there's any form of infatuation that's stronger than any other kind of love, it's the infatuation of a teenage girl in love with her idol!
do we have a teenage girl? YES!
do we have an idol? ALSO: YES!

Let's go to the setting of this story, namely Beachpool (formerly known as Liverpool), since there's more water than anything else these days
Nowadays every single Liverpudlian kid gets taught about the mysterious secret files department dedicaded to Paul McCartney!

there have been lots of rumours: some say it can be found in The Liver Building, some say you'll find it when you reach the end of a rainbow and some...
-here's where things get interesting-
say you can find it when u enter the castle of Teh Kwin (warning: entering is at own risk, a rumour once said that ppl who  tried to enter it, encountered teh kwin and were stared to death and couldn't handle the tsundere-ness)
Once you're inside the castle you take the 3 km long stairs, until you've reached the highest room of the palace! (hint: the one that has an angry aph iceland pic that says 'don't u enter' on it)
u know u're in the right room when it looks like someone peed on the wall (What the actual f*ck, Cludi - I'm not making this up).

walls covered in pee and paul (you'd think someone as rich as teh kwin could afford an interior designer :/ )
looks like the room of a normal fangirl, BUT WAIT
u have to look for a certain door

congrats! you has now reached 'the secret files department of the caaastle'

what can we find in here:
well, actually the usual fangirl stuff
-a wall with inspiring quotes

-secret admiration part

-a burn book

and to end with a scene from Cludi nr1 favourite film

time to run to the nearest mountain and sing

(joke's on u Cludi, there are no mountains in Liverpool)

haha ^ 

in conclusion, nobody knows why Teh Kwin keeps this a secret since she got married to Pawl like 5000 years ago

(yup, back in good ol' medieval times when weddings were cheap, Pawl was young and Cludi was like I dunno 5 years old XDD)

jest rendem stehff

warning: dark humour

okay, so there will be another small update for Cludi, 'cause this time she forgot how to use Scouse (we always thought it's impossible to forget about your native language, but hey .____. ...)

so
Scouse for starters (or Cludis) in a few simple steps:
1. take (British) English language
2. replace all 'i' and most vowels with 'eh'
3.conjugate second person singular like it's a third person singular (only in present tenses)
4.put random w sounds in words where they're not supposed to be
5.mumble a lot
6. make a face that says 'I just started pronouncing a word but I forgot what I was saying: a few examples:

CUNGRETS, U HAS NAW MASTERT TEH SCAWS LANGUWEG

-end of update-

meanwhile, some new news has just washed up (lol :'D) from Teh Cehteh uf Lehverpowl
THERE HAS BEEN A FLOOD!!!

 

newest advert in Lancashire:

(advert made by Flood)

But the daily life in Liverpool is still as usual:

 

they have found Paul McCartney's house

 

weell, probably not that much when u compare your salary to the ones of Paul and Ringo

like we said before, Liverpool = city of fangirls and therefore stalkers as well      

 Other news: Cludi is starting a revolution against me :c

 phu teenagers 

me:

jest u wait u little shet

Other news Pawl and John still don't get along

to end this, post: to those who wonder how Hogwarts is doing after we dropped Pawl there